Identity Change

No, I don´t want a sexchange, I feel pretty much ok as a woman, although I feel that at times there is more testosterone running in my veins than is necessary. Or on the contrary, because of the environement I am living in, it is just what I need. Ingemar Bergman´s autobiography Laterna Magica, re-read after twenty years, has been taking up a lot of my reading time, as has Saul Bellow´s More Die of Heartbreak; this may also have something to do with the overall sensation of being overwhelmed in general. Perhaps the problem is the Czech Republic - which I consider to be a woman (Prague most definitely) - is undergoing major surgery and other forms of rude attacks every day. No wonder I feel hurt. And then, reading the Czech and Swedish press leads to schizophrenic sensations - these nations are truly on the oppsite sides of the barricades. Most definitely when it comes to the question of Palestine and drawing cartoon figures for small kids. Reading about the absurd witch-hunt of artist Stina Wirsén makes me uneasy and angry (may I?). The Swedish press presented a similar discussion about Pippi Longstocking when the book was first published in the 1940s - the girl was just too rowdy, strange and unconventional. Out of this world. That was the written word, this is about the illustration. Too black, too much confirming the stereotype "we" have about coloured kids. Fantasy and humour, imagination and artistic playfulenss, not illwill -  is not considered. We are small children and must be told by a self-determined set of experts what is good for the majority. This is so Swedish. Yet Sweden gave the world Pippi and Ingmar Bergman - and in the making almost destroyed both of them. Strange, isn´t it.